After having kids at the end of 2018, free time and sleep became a luxury, so things like hikes or nature photography or blog posts about runs or, well, runs took a back seat. Things like spending time with our boys and sleep moved up in priority. In 2019, there were a lot of late nights feeding the boys, but I still had goals I wanted to accomplish in running. One of them being to run a marathon under 3 hours. I knew this was a stretch since my PR was set all the way back in 2009. Knocking 8 minutes off that a decade later would definitely not be easy.
I signed up for the Erie Marathon, figuring it doesn't get much flatter. To fit in training with the least disruption, I started back in April doing runs mainly in the evening and through the night, timing them so I was back for the early hour twin bottle feeding shift. I got in good runs early on, but my mileage was all over the place. A 40-mile week here, 20 miles the next, then a gap of almost a month barely running before the race in September.
Needless to say, I was never even close to PR pace. I hit the wall at mile 18 and the wheels fell off fast ending in a 3:47 marathon, making it my slowest ever by far. Not surprising looking back, but it's funny the tricks your mind can play to make you think you can get by on grit alone.
I got back to serious training in November with more determination than ever to get in top form for a spring marathon. Unfortunately, that training involved pounding the miles and in the process my body. Looking back at my running log, the training doesn't look all that crazy, but one thing that sticks out is the lack of rest days. I would do a sub-7-minute tempo run followed by two days of back-to-back long runs. I would use the foam roller after every run, rolling the pain out of what I thought was caused by a tight IT band.
By January, the side of my leg and behind my quad was hurting pretty regularly. One night, I took a hot bath, which I never do, to try to ease the pain. I laid down in bed, coughed or sneezed, and right then threw my back out. Electric pain shot through my body & I either passed out or almost passed out. The months that followed included sleeping on the floor because it was the only place I could get somewhat comfortable, accidentally falling asleep on a heating pad & being jolted awake to electric pain, losing feeling in my toes & traveling 30 minutes several days a week for 6 weeks to a chiropractor barely able to sit for the ride from the intense pain. Every minute of every day for months my body felt pain that even pain relievers couldn't mask. I really did a number this time.
Mike Tyson said it best:
"I broke my back."
"My back is broken."
"Spinal"
At some point several months later, the acute pain began to simmer down, but the nerve pain in my back, and probably just as much the psychological PTSD, wouldn't go away. I stopped running on January 9th, 2020 & didn't take another step until June 17th, 2021. On that day I ran a mile to test out my back. I ran a grand total of 285.5 miles from June 2021 through March 2024, an average of less than two miles/week.
Having had the back & nerve pain for such an extended period of time, I became well attuned to my body, how the pain felt, what aggravated it & how to avoid those things. Or at least I thought. Any run where I had pain that I thought would lead me back to that of January 9th, 2020 would instantly cause me not to run another step for weeks and months. The lines blurred between what was real pain to be concerned with and what was just paranoia to avoid it happening again. Looking back, both were feeding each other & preventing me to fix the root of the issue, which was lack of core strength & the confidence that not every pain was something to fear.
So many people deal with more serious, longer lasting health problems than mine. So for that, I feel thankful. But when you're in the midst of it, it's easy to lose hope. Especially when it's preventing you from doing your passion, running.
But where there's bad there's always good. I learned that I didn't need running. Biking and swimming acted as a great lower impact alternative for me to get my endorphin fix and clear my head. Walking in the neighborhood & hiking on trails also helped. I learned I needed to respect my body & listen to it. The injury gave my body a much needed, albeit forced, rest.
I finally got back to running regularly in November 2024. I worked my way up in mileage slowly, still mixing in biking and swimming & never running two consecutive days in a row. By January, my long runs were above 15 miles, and I did a 20 miler in under 8:30 pace. I was back!
In the past, I focused mainly on weekly mileage during a training cycle. Getting up to 50-60 miles per week for marathon or ultra training was usually the goal. Now I'm listening much more closely to my body and paying less attention to weekly mileage. Cross-training has reduced the number of running days available each week but spares my body the extra pounding while still getting in the aerobic benefit.
I learned in September 2024 that my company covers a subscription to an app called Hinge Health as a benefit to employee health. I signed up for this & have been doing it ever since. They have daily exercises that target different areas of your body to stretch & strengthen. Each set consists of 5-7 exercises and usually lasts no more than 10 minutes. The key is consistency. I couldn't "fix" my body overnight, just like I didn't "break" it overnight.
They also have coaches and certified physical therapists that work with you personally to help address your specific problem. I even did a video call with a therapist, talked through my history and where I was at now. It was nice to talk to an actual person educated in therapy. She offered great advice, but more importantly, gave me the confidence to "get back on the horse". The app also enforces this by giving daily articles, advice and stories of other users to support the journey back from chronic pain.
An article that sticks out the most was about pain and the different types. How short-term pain is obviously important to prevent us from doing damage to our body, but long-term pain can be a result of a confused nervous system falsely triggering pain responses sometimes due to a learned emotional distress & not always tied to actual active damage.
All the things I've mentioned above have helped get my back to a better state. I went to a few different chiropractors. Those seemed to help, but it's always hard to tell. I also think the basic passage of time deserves credit. Our bodies are typically resilient and naturally want to heal themselves. That being said, I don't think time alone would've gotten me totally back to being healthy & running, although I don't believe any of the things I've mentioned would've individually either. They all collectively healed.
